Sunday, February 12, 2006

Cheney Shoots From the Hip Again

Dick Cheney accidentally shot his hunting partner today - or yesterday. I think the story was held 24 hours for some reason, perhaps to avoid the Sunday morning talk show circuit. This raises all kinds of questions:

1) What is a guy with all kinds of health problems doing out tromping around with a shotgun?
2) How will Bill Clinton ultimately bear the responsibility for this?
3) Why wasn't Scalia with him when it could really do the country some good?
4) Will the public finally understand that this guy hasn't been shooting straight since he took office?
5) Is this the real reason why he had five deferments during the draft?
6) Will Rove spin the blame for this on the victim for stepping in front of Cheney's target?
7) Is Elmer Fudd really a heartbeat away from the presidency?

I've got to see Leno, Letterman and Stewart tomorrow night.


Citizenkan said...

priceless. what was the bird count?

RSmith said...

. . . but first he muttered 'go fuck yourself' . . . and then blam!

Citizenkan said...

...any info on who was in Cheney's hunting party of ten? somethings up.

RSmith said...

I think was only a hunting party of four - there was something about a hunting party of ten on the net, but that was in Pennsylvania back in 2003. That "hunt" became somewhat controversial because Cheney and his buds reportedly killed over 400 birds - these were "canned" birds, raised and released to be hunted on a private hunting facility. How rich men hunt, I guess. Animal rights people (and some hunters) were appalled.
There are lots of weird things about this latest story - why they waited so long to report it (was Cheney drinking at the time?). I find it odd that a bunch of good-old Texas boys would bring the little lady along to sit in the car. I wonder if she was even there at all.
The White House downplayed it, of course, saying the poor guy was only "peppered" with shot - but apparently at least one pellet lodged in our near the heart, causing today's mild heart attack.
Who would have thought such a crazy event would cause so much attention? I mean, these guys lie to the world and trump up a war that leads to the deaths of thousands upon thousands of people - and then a hunting accident in Texas gets the media in an uproar. Earl would say this is karma, don't ya think?

Citizenkan said...

Karma, indeed! (Earl gets it.)

So what I've read is Dick, Harry, Katherine and Pamela. Afternoon picnic of jicama salad, antelope and Dr.Pepper. (uh huh.)

By 5:30pm wouldn't you think they'd be packing it in for the day? That would explain Katherine in or at the car. Maybe Dick was carrying his gun and it discharged a bit closer to Harry than their claim of 30 yards away. That would also explain their 22 hour reporting lapse. "Ok, guys, what's our story? How the hell do we explain this and cover Dick? How do we get Pam out of here?"

And why would Harry be out picking up a quail? I thought they had dogs to do that. Perhaps the boys were out doing a bit of bird-dogging themselves!

RSmith said...

Where was Lynn? I think maybe there was a little "bird-doggin'" going on here. I read on one of those "left wing blogs" that this isn't the first time Dick has been caught with her - so, is this a case of premature firing? I do think they spent a good deal of time getting the story straight. First call was probably to Rove.

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